"Closing Time...every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end"
so being a hardcore 90's music fan that I am, I decided to make reference to one of the greatest songs of that era...Semisonic's "Closing Time". Seemed to fit pretty well with tonight(I close at work) and also I thought it was appropriate because of the changes this new year has brought...not only to me but to other people in my life as well.
Human nature to feel melancholic when something ends(so long as that "thing" was pleasant..but come to think of it, we tend to mourn the ending of some unpleasant things as well..go figure). We are adaptable beings, molding ourselves to our situation...almost to the point of conforming. In a sense, we are all conformists. Yes, some of us try to rebel and scream at the top of our lungs that "we are different! I will not conform!" but ultimately, we do. Whether it is sticking around in a less than thrilling job because it pays the bills or staying in a relationship because we hope that we can somehow fix it(or worse, we think that we can't do any better)
It's happened to me. If it hasn't already happened, it will happen to you. Nonconformity is not only being able to throw on some raggedy clothes(denouncing style and fashion and what is "in") or having a mohawk on your head, it's about knowing exactly when to settle and when to gracefully bow out.
It's a hard thing...in relationships, for example, one goes into it with high hopes. Everything is wonderful and new. You and your sweetheart are in a constant blissful state, problems and arguments seem so nonexistent....but one day, you wake up. Fall out of that cloud and realize that he will not always think the way you do. and vice versa. you argue, scream, and at times, insult.
But years have gone by, you've been with this person for years. You've grown accustomed to them, their scent, their laugh, their walk, even the silly way they pronounce "Mississipi". And you care. So you try and try, despite obvious signs screaming in your face that "HE IS NOT MEANT FOR YOU". You refuse to believe that this person, who you've spent more than 2 years with, is not the one meant for you.
So much time spent, so many memories, what a waste if I call it quits now, you think. The eternal optimist, you stick it out. Try to compromise and salvage this already damaged relationship... you might not even be happy but the fact that you've invested SO MUCH TIME and SO MUCH EFFORT into it makes you stick around. Deep inside you think that maybe this is how things are, that this is the best that you will ever get.Suck it up Michelle, because you may not be happy now but who knows what will happen if you leave and try and start anew with someone else? perhaps you'll be miserable with that person....so you settle. Conforming to being unhappy, staying in a relationship that has long been struck by rigor mortis.
And so...yet another conformist is created, set to join the ranks of thousands who settle when they should not. Fortunately, some of us realize that this is NOT what I want. Yes I spent time and effort and yes, I have cried(sobbed at times) countless times in order to make this work. But it did not. AND THAT IS NOT MY FAULT. So, if you are in a situation where you need OUT, whether it be a job where your boss treats you like shit or in a 5 year relationship that is CLEARLY not going anywhere anymore, gracefully(always keep your dignity) bow out. Learn from what happened and move onto the next best thing(because there is always THE NEXT BEST THING, always.) and put your heart and soul into that. Doesn't matter if you've been hurt or if you find it hard to trust, humans have been programmed to be in control of their thoughts and feelings. If an opportunity presents itself, take it.
"Closing time - time for you to go out, go out into the world"-Semisonic
